You are one college memory that I am NOT going to miss.



However, I will not allow you to ruin my day. Because I have a great husband, a great family coming to help us move, some great friends I get to photograph on my study break, some great coffee from my sweet husband, and one more semester before I'll never have to see you again. Woop woop!

Chris and I have been trying to make various things from scratch to save money AND to have fun crafty time because we're nerds like that. ALSO, everything is so much more sentimental that way. Let's just be real, who doesn't love home made objects. I hope we can always make time for stuff like this. Especially things like Christmas stockings and ornaments. SO, look what Chris made for the top of our Christmas tree!! It's about a foot tall and directions can be found here: Origami Star

Disclaimer: this takes a couple hours..and when putting the final star together it was easier with two sets of hands.

1. We're moving in ONE WEEK! :)
2. Jordan is done with classes, only 3 exams left!
3. Nicaragua is happening in less than 3 weeks!!
4. We can finally get our Christmas tree once we move :)
5. After Nicaragua, our family will be expanding by ONE!...one dog. :)
6. Jordan gets to finally do all the crafty things she wants to do over Christmas break :)
7. Marriage is awesome!!!!!
8. Swing dance tomorrow!

Holla, holla! :)

Oh! And. Now that we have a tablet, we have made a (silly) commitment to start taking videos every now and again. We want to get in the habit long before we have kiddos so we can upload them to a youtube channel and share hilarious things with you. Never thought we'd join the youtube train...

That is all. Have a fantastic Friday.

Chris and I can't have a Christmas tree until we move into our apartment in a couple weeks=bummer. So I decided to gather some sticks from outside and make this little guy. I wrapped it with an 18ft pine garland that I found for two dollars. So hooray for our little baby tree.



Also, we thought it would be fun to make each others stockings this year. Photos of the finished products coming soooon! :)

Okay. LOVE. Helllooo Christmas Gifts!
It's hard to see in the pictures, but these are two different sizes. The one on the right is about two inches shorter. Also, the one on the left is made out of a recycled jelly container! We have tons of them. The shorter one was just a small candle holder we had. I used a hot glue gun because it was faster than waiting for other glue to dry, and I knew I'd be wrapping them with the leather strips I had, so I figured those would reinforce it! The hot glue is really sturdy though. Because I'm using tiny tea-lights in them, I'm not worried about the heat messing with the glue. I love the way these look with our burlap table cloths!! So easy.

My mom found this idea on This awesome blog, and I had almost the exact same pair of white shoes from when Chris and I took a Nurse Aide class together in the summer. I definitely wasn't planning on wearing them again and the white was already fading! These shoes can usually be found at Wal-mart, Target, and I've even seen them at the Dollar Store for really cheap. All you do is:

-Remove the laces
-Pick your dye! (I got mine at Wal-mart for less than $2.
-Rinse the shoes with cold water while you heat up a pot of water
-Once the water is steaming, add your dye, then add your shoes!
-If the pot isn't big enough, dye them one at a time, just be sure to time it so they end up being the same shade
-I left mine in for about 10 minutes as I didn't want them too bright.
-Rinse well, and let air dry (or throw them in the dryer!)
-Sew a short piece of a elastic under the tongue of the shoe to prevent a loose fit from the lack of laces. (For more specific directions on this, go to the Sweet Verbena blog listed above.)
-Enjoy your new kicks.

“In the home begins the disruption of the peace of the world.”

I'm writing this approximately 24 hours after I wrote the above post. And I'm just gonna show ya how PRAYERS are straight up answered in tremendous ways.

SO-after I wrote the post (I admit, I was a little anxious/worried, despite the confidence and peace exuding from my writing (wishful thinking?)) I went to do some preliminary house/apartment shopping, as Chris works really weird hours and I needed to get a head start so he could have the opportunity to come if I found something. I knew that all of the places available were NOT posted online. Good thing, cause there were only like 2 places that were what we were looking for.

I went to a real estate properties place to make life easier, and walk to the door and a nice little sign says "We close Monday at 2." It was DEFINITELY after 2. That didn't help my worry. (That's what I get for worrying.)

SO, I head to the next properties building and BOOM-she hands me a master list of ALL of the properties they have available in the near future. Considering we have to move in the near NEAR future, I had to go through the list and cross out basically anything that was available after January. Technically it might have worked...but not very smoothly. I was left with four choices.

Went to the first one (and cheapest one): All I can say was it was a big no. Not safe, Chris would NOT have let me stay home alone there.
Second one: eh, okayish, but still not that great. (Mind you, I'm making these assumption from my car as I can't go inside because "you have to make appointments to tour 24 hours in advance"..the lady tells me.)
Third one: Definitely the location we wanted. Definitely the price we wanted. I take my pen to jot down how it looks and where it is to remind myself when I talk to Chris later that night, when I look up and a lady is approaching my window. It wasn't as creepy as that sounds.

I rolled down my window.
Her: "Are you looking for me???"
Me: ".....No.....?" (my fault, I pulled into a random parking space and apparently it was right in front of her apartment door.)
Her: Oh, well...can I help you with something?
Me Thinking: *Jeez lady...I literally just pulled in, I'm just writing*
Me actually: Um, well, my husband and I are having to move soon...so we're just checking out some possibilities.
Her: "OH! Well, wanna see the apartments? I'm the on-site property manager and I have the keys to the empty apartments."
Me Thinking: Jesus, forgive me for judging this sweet elderly lady, and also..don't let her be a psycho or something.
Me actually: "What!? That would be awesome!!!"

She opened the empty available apartment for me. PERFECTION. Totally spacious, two bedrooms, Big kitchen, in our price range, great location. Bam. Done. When is it available? "ASAP." More done. Next on the list: tell Chris, set up a time for him to go and look, and see if he approves.

We went this morning. He felt the same way about it (Yay, marriage!) We signed the lease. We're moving the weekend of December 16th.

Yep. That just happened.

SOOOOO, who is going to help us move!?!?!?!? :D

Only to Pendleton or somewhere closer to Chris' work. Don't get ahead of yourself, let me tell you how and why we were semi-forced into this predicament. The hubs and I have been hardcore praying about some things related to material resources and housing and things like that. We have always had a huge heart for "the family" as a whole, but I never knew how that was going to manifest itself in my life before I was married and living on my own. Before I was married, my parents blessed me with an amazing household..a car..a phone..a college education-no big deal right. Sike. They're ridiculously incredible and generous. SO. This is the first time in my life that I've been dealing with "serious" finances and budgets and big-life-decisions.

WELL. Christopher and I have always just loved orphans and stuff. This is totally normal, I think. I went through a phase for a while when I tried to convince my parentals to adopt (it will actually never end. they totally should..they'd be awesome at it. Mom-you guys should adopt.) And now that I have a family, we're getting pumped about the possibility (guarantee) of adoption. [The only questionable possibility is going to be the race, as I really would like an interracial family. Before you judge me, NO, I'm not for real being picky about the orphans I would love to have..I'll take all of them.]

Digression. Okay, so we really have been blown away lately by the fact that there are SO MANY empty bedrooms across America. A reliable friend proceeded to add to my burning fire of adoption-advocacy by telling us that if every church in America had just one family that decided to adopt an orphan, there wouldn't be ENOUGH orphans in America for them to have. In fact, the church to orphan ration was about 2:1. Now, I know there are some questionable churches out there..but you get the point. Also, not all people are cut out for adoption..I get that, I'll step off my soap box soon.

SO, as we've been discussing these possibilities, we have been hit with random confirmation and things that point to the fact that maybe we should think about how we could use our resources to make a start. We're not ready to be parents (unless God says so, I suppose), and we WANT to adopt after we have a child so they can be (interracial) buds and grow up together and stuff...but there ARE huge amounts of homeless/needy families/widows/orphans that could at least use a head start.

THEN, Chris was randomly listening to a Focus on the Family where Francis Chan was talking about how he and his wife felt called a while ago to take in a homeless woman and her child(ren) to help them get on their feet. They gave her a room in their house. She spoke spanish. They did not. They found her and said, ".....Mi casa es tu casa..????" Apparently that did the trick. How awesome is that? We think it is. In fact, Chris listened to it a second time with me in the car and we both just got even more excited.

THEN, the very next Sunday (the next day), our pastor pulled out the verse we had JUST been talking about: "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27

Our hearts exploded.

Then, we decided we should keep our eyes open for a two bedroom place closer to Chris' work. We didn't even know if we could get out of our 12 month lease. He went to the office, talked to them, and they said we could totally leave if we found a subleaser, or if they found a subleaser. But they said that first priority goes to empty units. He signed a form with our information on it, not realizing that it meant if they did find a subleaser..we'd be forced to give up our one bedroom unit (oops). Five days later...they found a subleaser. We have to move out by Jan 1. We're going to be in Nicaragua Jan 1. So basically, we have to move in less than a month.

If this didn't happen, I might not have had the guts and confidence to chase after this calling so soon. Maybe the Lord will place someone in our path that desperately needs a home, maybe this won't happen for a while. But I can guarantee that that room is not going to remain vacant on purpose. Maybe it will just be a friend or a relative that needs it. I have no idea. But Jesus doesssss!! Boom. Roasted. House/apartment-that-I-have-no-idea-about...here we come.

As far as "actively searching" for someone that needs a home...we have no idea what that's going to look like. We're praying that God just makes it obvious for us (selfish.) But seriously..I have no idea. All I know is that..nuestra casa es tu casa.

*To our friends who have taken the time to read this: Help us move? It'll be a party. We'll let ya know when.

Also, if ya wanna listen to the FC talk that we love from this post, it's called Faith and Family (part 1) by Francis Chan through Focus on the Family. And it can be found here:

FAITH AND FAMILY PT.1.

but I thought I would be oh so kind enough to post a list of what I consider to be relatively important parenting tips that I have learning through working with [my internship agency]. I know, I know..I'd be skeptical too if I were you, considering I have no parenting experience whatsoever at this point. Just calm down, grab a notepad and a pencil, and jot these little numbers down.

1. If you are a drug addict and you are also pregnant, the time during the pregnancy which would be LEAST harmful to the baby to do your drugs........is NEVER.

2. If you are pregnant and are going into labor, I've heard that it is painful. SO, if you have un-prescribed prescription painkillers it is best to just go ahead and take them NOT SELF-MEDICATE YOUR LABOR PAINS with un-prescribed pain-pills that you bought in a drug deal.

3. If you want to physically abuse your child, the best age to do it (as to best avoid psychological and physical damage) is NEVER.

4. When those high-maintenance children of yours intrude upon your drug use schedule, just do it in the same room as them. (Getting to be a parent AND use your drugs at the same time!? BONUS.)

4. When you FREQUENTLY USE DRUGS IN THE SAME ROOM AS YOUR CHILDREN, THEY TEST POSITIVE TOO. Imagine that.

5. And lastly, a fun fact! If you decided to disregard the advice in number 1 of this list, and now you want to know why your two month old child has been screaming his head off day and night since his birth date..it's because he is going through withdrawal because he was born addicted to your drugs.


This concludes our time talking about five profound and non-obvious parenting tips! If you try to tell me that these are actually VERY obvious, I will kindly give you multiple examples of how this just can't be true. And lastly, I will take a break from my obvious sarcasm to say..What the heck, people. Children. CHILDREN are precious gifts from God. Abstain from the acts that got you pregnant or invest in some birth control if you can't handle it.

Listening to my husband do random things around the house. Because the things he says when he does stuff like cleaning the bathroom cabinets out (right now) are hilarious. I'm literally typing this as he is talking (indirectly to me I guess?) I would like to add this this is occurs frequently in our household.

Chris: OH MY GOSH WHAT ARE ALL OF THESE PRODUCTS?....can we condense them? (as in pour them into one container..)

I admit, I have too many. Mainly because I put "lotion" down on the mandatory Tate-Christmas-list-on-gmail last year because I thought it was relatively inexpensive and easy...and then everyone got me lotion.

Chris: How the heck did this fuse-ball ball get into my container?

Chris: WHAT IS THIS!? Oh waiittt...I remember. It was the experiment I did with baking soda.

I have no idea what that was about.

Chris: (begins singing..) "I'm bringin sexy bacckkkkk...YEP..."

Chris: *Sets small ambiguous spray bottle down beside me.*
Me: What is it?
Chris: It says Linen Spray....?
Chris: [in robot voice] what.is.its.purpose.

Chris: (begins singing..) "Caliente chiccaaa, en mi apartment-ayyyy"

Chris: *runs quickly into kitchen* "I NEED BACKUP." *Rips paper towel off and runs back in.

(Jeez, how messy were our cabinets...)

Chris: [mexican accent] We will nay-ver have to look for anyyytheeeng ever agaaaain!!

Okay, that's enough. I better stop typing so my heart doesn't melt any further into the floor. I love my husband.

That is all.

Much more money to raise, much more preparing to do, but I'm not worried one bit! I can't wait to be over there.

"Let us more and more insist on raising funds of love, of kindness, of understanding, of peace. Money will come if we seek first the Kingdom of God - the rest will be given."

Yes!

Silence. Pain. Solitude. Hostility. Emptiness. Not exactly what you'd expect to find in the delivery room of a first time mother after giving birth to a tiny, beautiful baby boy.

The newborn lay asleep in the center of the room along in the new and unfamiliar world.
The mother and family sat around the perimeter.

The baby boy scratched his face with his tiny nails producing the first physical signs across his cheeks evidencing that this new earthly body is now susceptible to physical pain.

Nobody put his mittens on him.

He was still, asleep, not yet aware of his circumstances, his surroundings, his regretful, uninterested mother.

Not yet aware of emotional pain.

Every urge in my body told me to hold him and keep him warm and kiss his beautiful scratched cheeks.

I wanted to bring him home to adopt him as my own before he could awake to anything besides happiness and peace and Love.

Then I realized that these earthly maternal urges barely compare to the way the Lord views us and viewed me. The way my heart wanted to explode at the sight of this new life alone in the middle of the room barely scratches the surface....how crazy is that. I found comfort in the silence. I knew he was not knit together by accident.

Nothing surprises Him, and this little one will not be forsaken. Nothing surprises Him, and I will not be forsaken.

If you read the post directly below this, you will understand why I was alarmed when Chris yelled very loudly, "I THINK THERE IS A BABY IN HERE!!!!" while sleeping.

Don't get too excited. For one because we're not preggos nor will we be for a while (we think..)and for two, because if I know anything about Christopher it is that his brain is full of crazy. So in reality, he could have (and probably) was referring to the baby of a dinosaur. or an alien. or a platypus. Who knows.

Well. Today might just be one of greatest days ever because THIS stupid device is out of my body.



It hurt. But that's okay. Because I was going to have to chop of my whole arm if they didn't take it out soon. Fact: my body just can NOT do hormonal ANYTHING. Makes sense, right? I feel so much better knowing that I can now be aware of my body in it's natural state. It's funny how good it feels to go back to the way things were intended to be in the first place. (Imagine that.)




Okay, so maybe I almost threw up in the doctor's office (big baby), but my sweet husband was there to distract me with his dance moves and weird yoga positions while we waited (shhh, don't tell them.)

OH, and he also made me some rockin' celebratory pancakes.




Is it acceptable to go contra dancing with one arm? I'm going to.

One day with these two fellas = outbursts of random dancing (personal favorite), pumpkin carving, loud singing, and lots of laughing.



You know it's gettin' chilly when I bust these suckas out!



Yes, that is an exact-o knife. This is serious business.



What a dreamy day.

because Chris would have come home to a new apartment. It's okay, I took out my craft-craze on some hemp string and paper. I've been wanting to make a stringed-sign-wall-hangy-thing for months and months, just never got around to it. I guess it's kinda hard to see it in the pictures, but it's one of my favesies; Psalm 34:3.

As promised. The names of the exercises won't make much sense if you don't know Insanity, BUT the numbers should say it all.(The test usually happens each two weeks, but Chris was sick for a few days so we had to break. So these results are after 19 days instead of 14.)

The first number will be the results before beginning Insanity, and the second number represents the improvement after two weeks, or in this case, 19 days.

Jordan
Switch Kicks: [120] [124]
Power Jacks: [42] [47]
Power Knees: [79] [93]
Power Jumps: [17] [30]
Suicide Jumps: [10] [15]
Push-up Jacks: [14] [25]
Low Plank Oblique: [22] [37]
Globe Jumps: [7] [11]

Chris
Switch Kicks: [121] [117]
Power Jacks: [46] [48]
Power Knees: [82] [92]
Power Jumps: [31] [34]
Suicide Jumps: [15] [16]
Push-up Jacks: [24] [29]
Low Plank Oblique: [42] [50]
Globe Jumps: [8] [11]

'nough said.

If you're wondering why Chris' numbers aren't as dramatic as mine it's probably because he was tired before starting the second fit test, and he had a lot of energy when he first completed the test before beginning Insanity. As we continue the fit tests, you will continue to see increases.

It's crazy to look at these numbers and think back on when our bodies just couldn't do as many as we can do now. And it's crazy to think that in two weeks we'll be able to do EVEN MORE. It's amazing what our bodies are capable of.

GO DO SOME INSANITY, PEOPLE. The evidence is clear. :)

I'll post again when the time comes, and then at the end of the 60 days I'll post the very first test results shown above and the very last one to show the initial versus the final numbers! Crazy.

2 Timothy 1:7
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

I've always (since I can remember) been afraid of horses. I think they are one of the most beautiful creatures EVER, but coming close to them gives me the most unsettled feeling ever. I didn't fall off of one as a child, or have any sort of traumatic horse-related experiences (unless I did and my mother never told me...MOM....) Kidding. I really didn't. It's a completely irrational fear that came from nowhere.
That is why I admire people like Leah who climbs ONTO them, and jumps OVER things with them. What. Ridiculous.
That being said, I feel as though this season of my life is one in which I am out to conquer my fears.
In no particular order, the ones that come to mind are:
1)That God isn't going to provide for us.
2)That my artsy hobbies like photography and other crafty things are going to be rejected by the general public.
3)That I am not capable of breaking bad habits.
4)That I am not going to be a good wife or mother.
5)....
......
174)......and on and on...

I don't walk around thinking about these things. Seriously. They are just ones that I encounter at various times and don't really think about or deal with.

So basically, God provided for us in the form of making finances appear out of thin air from the start of our marriage until now. Then he provided Chris with a gajillion interviews and finally the perfect job for him.

So basically, I went out on a limb and started displaying my photography. And then I started getting all kinds of great feedback. And then I came to the even greater conclusion that I don't really care WHO likes my art because I DO.

I went out and took some stinkin' pictures of a HORSE. Take that. My heart beat at a significantly high rate the whole time. There was a fence in between us. Baby steps.




These are all just little examples. But they are also little victories.

I want to live without fear. I want to own my desires and passions as I know that they were given to me when I was created. I want to take risks and push myself beyond a life of comfort. And for when all of these words I have just said fly out the window and I am faced again with my fears, I have this:

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.

Psalm 27:1
The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid?

Psalm 56:3-4
When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?

Matthew 10:26
Therefore do not fear them. For there is nothing covered that will not be revealed, and hidden that will not be known.

2 Corinthians 4:7-11
But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Had so much fun practicing my photography on these two. Always a hilarious time. :)
Some of my faves:

Talking about Insanity makes me feel like a super fitness crazed individual that's obsessed with body image--I can assure you, I am not. Nor have I ever been. My goal in exercising has never been to "look better," but has always been to relieve stress and to do good things for my body! Unfortunately, the culture of our country likes to think that exercise is just a means of looking "good," and barely goes below the surface of vanity.

Personally, I think people would think otherwise if we could all look into the INSIDES of our bodies instead of the outsides. If we could actually see our bodies processing the food we put inside them, could physically see what a lack of exercise does to the organs and muscles and blood flow on the inside...more would make time for it!

Good thing I have my health science husband to remind me of all these things when I'm curious about them (which is often.)

That being said: Insanity, I highly HIGHLY recommend it. I want to retract the statement I made at the beginning about needing to be in descent shape to start. Yes-it would be more motivating that way (which is why I said it) BUT, there are ways to do it in a more low impact way so that you can work up to the point they are at in the video. In fact, we had to take a small break when Chris was getting over his sickness and when he started back he took it easy so his body could recover, and he still got a good work out.

So, there is a way to track your progress through Insanity by these things called "Fit Tests." The fit test is a workout in itself, but goes through a list of exercises that you are to complete while COUNTING how many you're doing. You write it down, and then every two weeks throughout the Insanity schedule, you do it again and watch how you've improved. We are closing in our the time where we will be doing our second fit test so that we can compare it with our first time, and I'll be sure to post both of our scores so you can see the difference!!

Besides that, we both have freakish amounts of energy and feel so good all the time due to the release of toxins that happens when you sweat that much! (You can always shower, people..sweat is GOOD for you!) We can also see physical differences too, which is a plus. :) All around, it's just a very well designed work out that has put my "normal gym routines" to shame. We're both probably going to rely on Insanity for working out for many many years, and the best part is your living room becomes your gym, and you don't need ANY equipment other than your body! :) Can't beat it. We'll post the fit tests results soon! Need a motivational boost? Go watch Supersize Me. Haha.

Yep! Approved. Esta es muy bueno, pero necesito estudio espanol mucho. Estamos excitados!! But now we're off to send letters. Hooray!

Christopher is such an amazing chef. I'm not usually one to take pictures of food and stuff, but this time..I had to. This quiche was the best thing ever in the world ever. Just kidding, that's a major exaggeration. But it was really good and I am still amazed by his skillz. Did I mention he didn't use a recipe? I watched this madness with my own eyes. I'll ask him to put the recipe (best to his memory) up.





andddd real grape juice to drink! REAL!

I guess I haven't written on here sine Chris GOT HIRED! Oh my gracious, it has been so amazing to not have to budget so severely anymore, but we have learned a lot about living off of very little income, and I am confident that if we ever need to again we will be prepared. Chris and I feel extremely strongly about not ever going into debt, and even though we've only been married four-ish months, we're practicing what we preach! Chris has seen so much pain in his life that is very connected to the financial burdens of people very close to him, and I will do anything I can to support him and steer us away from that type of chaos. I was never one of those people who thought that God would just drop money on our doorstep/mailbox/etc. But rest assured, it happens. We never relied on that money, and the whole time we were searching for work, but He knew that the perfect job for Chris was just around the corner.

If you don't believe in material blessings--come over. I'll give you a bajillion examples. And when I say literally dropping money off on our doorstep, I mean it. He "is faithful and will not let you be tested beyond what you can handle..He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it(!!!!!)"

That being said, now that he got hired, we're not sure what is going to happen with going to Nicaragua. We are still waiting to hear back from his employer, but we're just praying that all goes well and that God's will will be done. As most of you know, Chris and I feel really really really called and connected to this trip, so we're just not sure what is in store with this new job.

BUT, how grateful we are for it. It still hasn't set in that this is real, but this job is such a blessing. And TONIGHT, our favorite pregnant couple-DAVID AND LEAH are here! :) So bonfire, laughs, and hugs are on our agenda for the night. YAY!

..who is actually a bear preparing for hibernation. Seriously, people..we are NOT winter folk. I admire friends such as the Lilley's (holla Aaron and Kim) who thrive in their cute flannel outfits and their love for the crisp winter air.

To us, all we notice are dead trees and the lack of fresh fruit (or affordable fresh fruit for that matter), the inability to breathe normally outside, and the extra time it takes to wear 254 layers and then shed them/put them back on as necessary. The one good thing about winter--is how much more excited and grateful I am when it turns to Spring. Sorry. Looks like we've just knocked out a large portion of the US in terms of future places of residence. (Kidding, I hope that God doesn't use this to call us to live somewhere frigid and to rely on him for sanity...never say never I suppose. *Cough, mom, Columbia, cough.)

Sorry. Digression. Okay. Thus, every time I come home lately, Chris has one of these:



Bring on the canning and the preserving and the eating of good fruits and things alllllllll year! :) I promise we won't turn Scrooge-y all winter. ;) We're just silly kids who love the warm sunshine.

Apple butter and peach preserves for Christmas gifts, anyone? :D

This is the INSANE workout called Insanity that everyone has been talking about. It's supposed to be the hardest one out there, and Chris and I started it today. It's 60 days of working out (with a day of rest each week) and I can honestly say I have never sweat so much in my entire life as we did the first day (and the first day wasn't even the full work out, it was just the "Fit Test" so that we can mark our progress every two weeks. My entire body is sore, but we love it. The best part about it is that Chris, being a health science major, knows all about the best work outs to do to see results..and all of these are the ones he's talked about since I've known him...they are just condensed into a ridiculously hard and condensed set. They don't require ANY weights or mats or all that jazz, just your body! I will admit though, you have to be in SOMEWHAT descent shape before you start..otherwise it would be WAY too demotivating. Also, we both tend to enjoy the "it hurts so good" workouts involving a lot of sweat. And tears. (Kidding about the tears.) (But I'll probably cry tomorrow.)

Here goes! :)

Sarah of The Tattered Traveler is one of my old college neighbors, and she is extremely talented. She's got tons of artsy talent, and you should pass along her Etsy Site to all of your friends! Go look! :)

Can scratch that sucka' off! And don't tell me they don't deserve a place on a bucket list. These guys are great. And little did I know I'd be this close. And very little did I know I'd have a sweet camera to take pictures of them with. (Thanks Mom.)

While driving. However, it's an incredibly hard but good way to practice due to the super fast changes in light. Anyways, I started getting a bit dizzy so I just looked up to the sky for a moment. And bam. This is what I saw.





Can I get a "what whaaaat!!!" for creation. Fureal.

[I'm floating up the stairwell with my toes grazing the cedar, thinking softly what a tinder box we live in....and what a flammable heart I've been given.]


I'm finding more and more throughout this internship of the state of my heart in the midst of a darker side of the world. I find myself leveling on a playing field so similar to that of Habbakuk....


Except I have not yet been able to rejoice and rest in the sovereignty of the Creator.


My heart wants to separate away this broken and lost side of the world from what I desire God's plan to be. This isn't what He desires for us, for anything, especially for children. Then I remember that he's pursuing them too, they just don't know it.


Or they don't want to know it. This broken and lost side of the world is just an extension of the evil we have allowed to come inside.


And I'm just as guilty as the worst of these.


God still holds my heart.


He still holds their heart. He's madly in love with them too.


They beat their children. He's still madly in love.


They sexually abuse their children. He's still madly in love.


They give their children drugs. Still in love.


They'd rather give their children up than have to give their drug addiction up. Still. In. Love.


Heartbroken, but in love. And in pursuit. And wishing their eyes would be open to the one thing that would fill the emptiness...wishing they could experience the gift of parenting.....and of being a child.


Heartbroken. But in love. And that's where I am too. Heartbroken, but in love, in a tinder box, with a flammable heart.

this post won't be as entirely exciting as my last post alluded to it being. Mostly because I am exhausted and a bit overwhelmed, but don't worry..there are hints of excitement on the inside. I promise.

1. Interning=still great, a lot to learn and still getting adjust to the flow of things.
2. My emotional state=can't decide if it wants to be depressed about the evil people in the world or rest in the fact that God is still sovereign..
3. House Church=it's official. The Lilleypad is hoppin. (Few will understand this reference.) Pumped about the awesomeness that is this year.
4. School schedule=shoot me in the hand. Probs the most difficult semester of them all. (Bonus: at least my last semester will seem easy in comparison.)
5. Husband=rocks my face off. Have I mentioned that I haven't cooked a meal in who knows how many days. I love to cook, people. This is not normal. AKA, busy schedule (AKA...my husband rocks my face off), and I am so stinkin' grateful he is such an amazing/willing chef.
6. I decided two seconds ago that I AM going to cook a fabulous dinner tonight for him to come home to. My soul needs it.
7. Espanol= Es muy dificil y no comprendo......y estoy asustado.
8. Is it acceptable to take a nap before making dinner?

On that note..

I am so excited right now (and exhausted) but mostly excited. I can't write long because I'm about to leave for the FIRST HOUSECHURCH OF THE SCHOOL YEAR (Holla!) But..first day of interning was oh so fantastic.

I'll boil it down to this:
My whole life I've wondered why I am the way I am, why I think the way I think, why I befriend the people I befriend, why some things make me tick, and others do not...why I never seemed to fit in with the "norms" of life as I knew it (and when I did fit in..it lead to massive amounts of trouble.) I never understand why everyone looked at me like an IDIOT (aside from my family and close friends) when I decided I was interested in social work, and I never understood why I didn't know about social work earlier. When I started those classes, I spent my classes wide eyed and with a heart about to leap out of my chest at the perfection that was this field of study. I totally fit in, and it was a WHOLE different world of Clemson and college I never knew before. The students, the professors, it's a different universe of strangely like-minded people. I totally fit in and I totally dig it. (This is a major accomplishment for me considering I grew up beating myself up for EVERYTHING and never fully felt as though I belonged in a certain "crowd"..I also felt like I was basically mediocre at everything. This is really sad as I type this because God and my family were shaping me to eventually discover things about myself that I am really proud of.)

Well.
If DSS is the "dirty-work" of the social services world (which it is known for), then I am in for a treat. This position, the workers, the supervisors...they are some rockin' people. Their work is the bomb, and I hope that my experience there will allow me to clear up the very common and very incorrect misconceptions people tend to have about DSS and social workers in general. I can't speak on the behalf of these positions everywhere across the US, but I can speak for where I am now. This work is hard, it's emotionally challenging, and it has it's dark days..but it is NECESSARY, and the goals and protocols set in place are REALLY positive and really focus on rehabilitation..not handing out checks and slappin' a bandaid on the situations. These people are IN the communities, IN the homes, IN the families using every resource, every idea, every theory, and every amount of energy to get these families on track. And they love every minute of it. (Why else would you get payed so little to do something so crazy. Come on.)

More to come!

..the Hayes family STILL manages to teach me great things. Need a good read? This family is inspiring. Seriously. And we totally miss them, and there is a Hayes-sized-hole in the hearts of basically everyone at DCF and used-to-be-Riggs family, but we are so excited to hear about their adventures!

Hayes Family Odyssey

But I'm kind of excited that I'm in school an extra year.
I didn't wish for it, and I surely feel a good bit of guilt because it's expensive for my parents...but all that aside, I realized today that if I HAD graduated in May..I'd be missing school right now for various reasons. Last school year I was so focused on the wedding and marriage that I had a really hard time enjoying student life and my classes. I did well and I was proud of my grades, but if I had graduated I would be looking back thinking about how I "missed" the joys of senior year.

Now that I'm married, there is a sense of relief and peace, and I'm not anxious about anything. I'm excited for having this year to lead a small group with my husband at our house church, and to be able to see my younger brother experience another year of college. My husband (who is totally an amazing over-achiever and thus misses out on a lot of fun activities due to his heavy school work load) will get to experience all the joys of college life without the exam weeks, papers, and projects.

And finally, it gives us a chance as newlyweds to breathe and really pray over where God wants us to be next year. We didn't have to rush into that decision in the midst of engagement and marriage and graduation. This is SUCH a blessing for us, because both of us are very similar in that we like to think things through and rest without having a million decisions to make at once.

So, sorry Mom and Dad for the extra expense, but it is yet another blessing you have given to Chris and I, and I'm so grateful for it!

Here's to the super-senior victory lap! And to the day when my parents will laugh and cry and kiss the ground (and their wallets) when I finally walk across the stage at graduation. (I'm totally looking forward to it.)

I've got one. For people who have lost their hearing.

As of right now, I can only hear out of my right ear due to this VERY awful ear infection that I got, which started from a not-so-painful swimmers ear and progressed into a beastly infection that decided to take over my left ear.

To be honest, I feel very defeated right now. First it was my wisdom teeth, now it's my ears..two of which I think are the most painful areas to feel pain. Mostly because they are on the head. And jaw pain/ear pain almost guarantees head pain and bad sleeping due to the fact that you won't be able to roll over onto the affected side. :(

I really really want to keep a positive mind. I won't let this get me down..especially right before school/work/internship starts. However, I really really think it's AMAZING that people lose their hearing completely and go on to learn an entirely new language from the ground up. I just feel so helpless and pitiful, and I'm totally not acting like myself..mostly because I can't hear whats going on, and its pretty painful so Chris has been doing everything around here. When I'm down, I'm usually down until my situation gets better, and that is not a good quality to have. It's so hard for me to see outside my circumstances, so to hear stories about people that persevere after ridiculous accidents (lost hearing, eyesight, limbs, etc) really motivates me to step outside of my circumstances. It definitely could be worse.

I can't say I've made it that far. I still feel pretty bummed. Especially because I start work today doing after school counseling and I want to be able to pour out energy on these little guys...guess I'll have to tone it down until I'm fully healed. Prayer would be much appreciated. Here's to hoping these antibiotics kick in sooner than later.

This is was my coffee pot. I can't decide what is more tragic..the fact that the pot is broken to a million pieces, or the fact that there's a whole lot of coffee wasted on the floor.

At one moment, this guy was sitting perfectly on the counter. Then my butterfingers decided to pick it up and let go of it. Then I just stared at it in this condition....for a really long time.

Chris dropped what he was doing (not literally, thank goodness) and picked up all the glass (what a man) and I contemplated getting out the other coffee maker until I realized that that is ridiculous. Because I don't NEED the coffee. Jeez. What a stupid hold it has over my mornings. (Flashback to lent?) Anyways...The other coffee maker is for my brother. Because I don't need two.

My morning took a turn for the better when I realized that when we got to raid the Hayes kitchen [see Pantry Makeover.] we got like a 35 year supply of every kind of tea you could imagine.

Then I remembered the super legit chai tea that our friend Leah's mom made us..and sure enough I found enough chai tea to last us through at least 3 winters. or summers. or falls. (When is chai tea NOT good!?) Plus, we make it with almond milk since we're lactose intolerant..and I'm pretty sure its EVEN better. Just sayin'. Try it.

I must say, looking at the coffee maker without the pot is just kind of sad. But waking up and drinking chai just feels really really good. Plus, Chris seems to enjoy it as well! Bonus!

I don't WANT to be dependent on coffee. In fact, I don't want to be dependent on ANYTHING materialistic and non-God related. So even when we get our replacement decanter, I'm going to try and switch it up. Yes, I realize tea is still caffeinated. But it's NOT coffee. Baby steps.

I secretly want to be a filmmaker. It all appears so easy until you actually hold a camera and are lost in the fact that you don't even know where to begin. How do you capture art, feeling, emotion through the lens of a video camera?

looks like I just found my life goal #34,794.

that's okay. Hopefully we'll remember more.

R: [to Chris] why did you have to shut my door?
Chris: because we have to help out your roommate and he needs the door shut for it
R: Well how am I supposed to see your pretty wife walk down the hallway with the door shut?
Chris: HEY! You can't be lookin' at her! She's my wife!
R: Well too bad she was holding my hand earlier today.....

What a flirty con-man.



W: [who has dementia] I'm about as lost as a mockingbird with its tail cut off.
Jordan: No you aren't, Ms. W! We're in you're room!
W: I don't know what the S*** you're talking about!! I can't even remember what happened two seconds ago.
Jordan: Ms. W, this IS your room, this is all your stuff.
W: Well, d**m. Get me the h*** outta this dungeon.

*Don't worry, y'all. Dementia is not a funny disease. But we LOVE Ms. W, she's a hoot. She's always angry, but her words are priceless.

Nursing homes tend to be a bit depressing, once you learn to laugh and learn from these people, time flies by. Chris and I come home and quote residents ALL night, it is hilarious. Such a fun experience.

I don't know where you've decided to disappear too, or who took you, or why you decided they'd be a better owner than me, but not having you around is getting really old. I'm sharing Chris' ipod, but it's not the same. There is music on you that is not on my computer anymore, and if you don't come back it will be lost forever because I can't afford to buy it again.

It's been a few months since I last saw (heard) you, but if you could reappear or teleport back from the thief who stole you I would really appreciate it.

I've really enjoyed nurse aid clinicals. Most people said, through grimaced faces, that it's a "tough" and "humbling" job, and many just flat out said it sucks. Turns out, I actually enjoy it. (Just another reason to take discouraging words with a grain of salt...as we've been learning a LOT lately.) While I can see that working as an aid in the nursing home setting could get old after many months, it's still an okay place to be. There are definitely some bad seeds, but too many crazy, funny, sweet little elderly people to get caught up with them. I have my health, and they don't. I'd probably be a grumpy old fart too if I had to press a stupid button every time I had to pee (which is often.)

Anyways, as I was feeding my resident lunch this afternoon I was so happy to see how excited she was with the menu for the day. She couldn't use her hands, but after every bite she would say "that's good! Do you like [insert food she just ate.]"

Or another resident who doesn't talk much, but if you catch her with a silly face she'll laugh and laugh and laugh and it's definitely contagious. In our experience so far, the only discouraging part has been seeing how the ACTUAL nurse aids treat the residents. Doing all of these things for people who can't do it themselves is definitely tiring, and very very similar to how you have to take care of an infant. But they aren't infants, so you don't talk to them as if they are. They have had WAY more life experiences than I have, and they are able to inspire and share wisdom if you let them. (Like C and H, husband and wife who room together and at a VERY ripe old age, he still refers to her as his "better half.")

I hope that if I'm ever working in this setting I am able to keep off the creeping complacency that happens when you get into a rhythm. These folks don't have all that much life left, but something can be learned from every patient despite their condition, and they deserve to be treated as worthy of good care.

You should read this quote every day and stop being stupid:

"The irony is that while God doesn't need us, but still wants us...we desperately need God, but don't really want him most of the time."

Thanks,
me.

...we need a video camera. You can't understand the hilarity of our lives together until you see it on video. We don't want to be reality stars. We're not that interesting, and to be honest, cable television couldn't handle us. They'd laugh too hard. (Kidding) But maybe it's true.

For instance, as I type this my husband is reading a coupon out loud in a hispanic accent. I don't know why. Actually I don't even think he notices he does that until I laugh. (Chris is going to seek vengeance for this post.)

That being said: first financial splurge on a non-necessity related purchase (which is an extreme rarity) is going to be a video camera. Get excited.

"The use of stimulants with children ages 2 to 4 tripled in the 1990's and have continued increasing since."

Context: Within the U.S. only
Who: IDIOTIC parents
Why: "my child is acting bipolar, happy one minute, sad the next, and hyperactive as well, but then sometimes they won't stop crying."

Let's just take a moment to look at the facts: YOU'RE CHILD IS TWO YEARS OLD..ya idiot.

My tolerance for these types of things is extremely low. I'm sorry. No I'm not. I'm not saying that children don't have their serious medical disorders. But you can't diagnose a CHILD with a personality, mood, or anxiety disorder when they are 2. or 3. or 4.

In fact, I'm not a mother, but I'd venture to say that if your two year old does NOT act bi-polar, you're probably in the minority. Terrible two's, anyone? Oh right, we have medication for that.

Things like these make me scratch my head for days. They also make me want to punch some parents in the face and give their kids to people who actually WANT them, yet can't have them.

Sorry. That's too violent. I want to calmly report them to DSS so that people like me can intervene and professionally slap some sense into their heads.

Thank you for your time, and if you have any questions, don't comment here, just go google Rebecca Riley.

These are the figs Chris and I picked from some massive fig trees in Clemson. Those bad boys literally had hundreds of figs on them, and most of them aren't ripe yet. So we'll be hittin' up that supply again soon enough. We literally eat them whole, it never gets old. But last night Chris made some homemade pizza dough (artisan style, I'd give the recipe but I don't know how he did it..) and we made homemade pizza. Never have I ever heard of/tried figs on pizza, but I made one with them on it and it was AMAZING.

Pizza recipes are silly, because you can throw any amount of anything you want on a pizza. So I don't have exact measurements (nor do I ever really use exact measurements), but I threw on figs (sliced), chopped red peppers, feta cheese, and balsamic marinade mixed with olive oil and garlic as the base. (Baslamic vinegar can be used if you don't have the marinade/dressing kind.)

Y'all. This pizza was SO good. If you like figs and the taste of balsamic..you'll love it. It definitely has a sweeter flavor than the classic red sauce pizza, but not sweet enough to remind you of a more dessert-y pizza. Go find a fig tree, and pick some figs, and throw them on a pizza.

If you're not excited about the new Needtobreathe album release..I do not think we can be friends.

Kidding.

But..really. This should help:



or this:

I'm studying mental illness right now. I learned this crazy fact. The majority of persons diagnosed with schizophrenia are winter-born babies.

Isn't that insane?

Correlation is not causation. However, those who are already predisposed to develop this illness are more likely to get it if they are winter-born due to speculations about pregnant women not being able to get as many vitamins and nutrients from summer season fruits and vegetables during the winter in the final stages of development in the womb.

Weird, huh.

Anyways, if you have an immediate family member with the illness ya might wanna play it on the safe side and plan for summer and fall births. ;) Just an interesting fact!

After our lab, we went over to the Hayes to finish painting the living room. Shannon told us we needed to go shopping in her fridge and cabinets, because after today, the food was being tossed. Its really hard for me to refuse free food, so Jordan and I filled about 10 walmart bags up with different food items. Now we have a 10 years supply of sweet tea and enough food to feed 2 people for a good while.

However, this supply of new food items didn't have anywhere to go in our apartment- except on top of our cabinets, so now the left side of our kitchen looks like a well stocked aisle in Bi-Lo. I really don't mind though because its during my 4th meal food scavenging raids that its especially convenient to have your own grocery store built in to the apartment.

-Chris

Today was the first day of CNA lab, where we learned all of our nurse aide skills on several plastic mannequins named Mr. Jones and some other lady whose name I can't remember. What was disturbing is that Mr. Jones had a female body. More disturbing was when I was changing Mr. Jones elastic stocking, somehow his head was violently separated from his body. The mannequins seemed used to all sorts of shocking events as their mouths are permanently fixed open and they have a deer-in-the-headlights look in their eyes.

And then there was Mrs. Mae, the 69 year old nurse who co-teaches the class. At first impression she seems like a sweet old grandma. But out of nowhere, she explains that we have to be prepared for the demands, such as "where have you taken my husband you B!@&H!!" or 90 year old female residents trying to feel up the male CNA's. You know. Just the usual at the ole nursing home.

-Chris.

--EDIT--
Correction: May is 79. SEVENTY NINE. that lady has no shame.

Wanna hear a stupid story?

My STUPID wisdom teeth have decided that they would like to come in right now (as opposed to earlier in the summer when I didn't have summer class and CNA and could have easily scheduled an appointment to get knocked out, had some teeth taken out, and then had Chris care for my pitiful, pain-medicated self while I healed for a few days.

Oh no. Now is the time they'd like to make their painful appearance through the thick gums in the back of the mouth. Did I mention (or even need to) that pain in the back of the jaw=pain in the inner ears? Why does that happen? Just for kicks and giggles I suppose. Knock me while I'm down.

So I wake up (after sleeping terribly due to my stupid wisdom teeth popping through my gums all night) and I decide that this day is going to be a complete and utter waste if I don't take something for the pain. Well I had two options: tylenol pm to put me in a zombie-like state in which I would be in while trying to study and complete my assignments for my online class (hello, D quality work) OR take excedrin which is equally as annoying as it is extra-strength and therefore loaded with enough caffeine to keep a narcoleptic up for 4 days.

Considering I needed to get my work done, I went with the excedrin. And then I decided to become the idiot of the century and drink coffee because I had just woken up and the excedrin hadn't taken effect yet (so I forgot I even took it.) GENIUS.

= caffeine freaking overload.

= I'm never hungry when I'm highly caffeinated.

Too much caffeine, empty stomach, lots of work to do, know I need to eat, not hungry anyway, I'll just start my work.

By this point, the caffeine is at its high and I feel like my head is going to explode or my heart is just going to decide to stop because it's mad at me for forcing it to act as if I've consumed a great deal of cocaine. (Isn't that the one that speeds up your heart? I don't know. I don't do drugs.)

STUPID. Well, I desperately wanted at least some of this caffeine to exit my body so I thought I could at least drink 17 gallons of water and see if that helped. It did. But then I still wasn't hungry yet needed to eat because I knew my body needed sustenance. I settled with toast and nutella (breakfast of champions, but more like lunch) and tried to listen to my lectures while my hand was trying to write faster than my brain could comprehend the information, leaving me with notes that look strangely similar to my dad's handwriting (sorry dad.) (Thank you, caffeine.)

Needless to say, what I had to look forward to once the miserable caffeine high ended was (you guessed it) more mouth (and ear) pain!!

I hate you, wisdom teeth. You are no longer welcome here and therefore the first chance I get, I am going to rid myself of you. forever.

DISCLAIMER: I love sleeping next to my husband. Really, I do. In fact, I would probs say it's one of my favorite things about being married to him. It's often the time in which we have really strange late night conversations that really don't make any sense and/or use his bookmark flashlight to make shadows on the wall (hello, first grade.)

On with my point: the past few nights Chris has been a bit restless and also delirious. You're probably wondering why you need to know this. And here is why:

The other night, I was having nightmares. This is almost guaranteed to happen if I don't read my sweet Bible before bed. Weird, I know. But not so weird because it's the best way to end the day. Anyways. I didn't read, and on came the horrific nightmares of strange people chasing me, and trying to kill me. So freaky. Anyways. Sometimes when dreaming, you can kind of feel what's actually happening in reality. (At least I'm pretty sure this happens to other people too.) And in my subconcious I literally "felt" like someone was seriously following me and was standing over me. I freaked out, as the feeling was strangely similar to the feeling I was already having in my dream..and I forced myself to awaken.

What's the worst way to wake up from a terrible nightmare where people are trying to find you?
Answer: with someone ACTUALLY hovering over you as if they have found you.

That's right. Chris was standing on his knees half facing me and half facing the window. (Paranormal Activity 2, anybody?) I freaked. I then managed to say "CHRIS. WHAT ARE YOU DOING." Although maybe not as clear. And he mumbled something about "trying to find the door."

What.

I don't know.

FYI: The door is on the opposite wall as the window is. He was facing in the complete wrong direction.

You can imagine my confusion, fear, and now fully awakened mind. It took me a long while to fall back asleep while trying to convince myself that I was only scared because of my stupid dream and that no, my husband is not possessed OR trying to kill me. In the morning, I asked Chris was the HECK he was doing. He giggled, and couldn't really remember except for the fact that he "was confused.............and trying to find the door."

Oh boy.

Basil, Cilantro, Peppers, and Tomato, what more do you need?

A theme very very present at our wedding. And obviously so, as it is the theme of marriage in the Word and the profound mystery that Paul likes to discuss. What's one awesome thing about this equation? Often times, (and by often I mean every time) Chris and I feel the same "calling," even if it doesn't occur at the exact same time. This is proof of the fact that we are two people, but one in God's eyes..and we believe that He will call us accordingly.

That being said, we both have a HUGE calling to a country far from here to do a specific work, and that's all I will say for now. We both feel it, and it is scary, and maybe it's not for the near future. Maybe it's for three years later, ten years later, we don't know. Right now we're making some effort, and seeing where it takes us..we aren't going to force this, nor will we be completely passive. But we know that doors will open at the perfect time.

Cheers to finding the key to the door, and welcoming the adventure waiting on the other side.

This past weekend was the first I'd ever seen chris with a newborn. I knew he was good with kids, but man. Every other time I turned around she was sleeping on his chest. Thus, meeting our first little niece has made me realize a few things:
1. Chris is going to be a great dad. (Don't worry, I actually knew this before the weekend, it just reinforced it.)
2. There's something very attractive about how excited and loving and great he was with her.
3. I want to have a lot of babies with him.

That is going to be such an amazing season in life, whenever it may be! I'm so thankful for my awesome husband! We had so much fun meeting her!

"When I was in my early thirties, I spent several months working with an outreach team treating the homeless mentally ill in NYC. Our team consisted of two nurses, and a psychiatrist, a kindly M.D. from Haiti whom everyone called Dr. Paul. I was the driver and recruiter.
Each night, we would arrive at a different homeless shelter and set up a portable clinic. I would circulate among the ragged, struggling, lonely men and women who were staying there, telling them that there were free physical exams as well as treatment for cuts, colds, and other minor health problems. The real goal, however, was to convince anyone who was clearly delusional to sit down for a chat with Dr. Paul. He, in turn, would try to get them to accepted medication or hospitalization.
What always amazed me about this job was how good it made me feel. I can't remember ever leaving a shelter not feeling exhilarated.
That experience taught me an important lesson about charity: it is an act of compassion that intrinsically is linked to action. To simply sit down and write a check for an organization is a good thing, no question. Genuine charity, though, occurs when we activeyl manifest God's love in the world. We know this is God's work because it turns the laws of the physical universe upside down. Instead of feeling drained by the energy we expend in an act of charity, we are filled."

Rob Bell's "Love Wins" has been on my heart lately. Ever since I began reading it, I just have had an unsettling issue with it. My friends and I discussed, however, that one of the main problems is that it seems to (unintentionally) create a sense of lukewarm, Christian passivity that really discourages us from seeking our purpose during this life time. I do not believe that this was Bell's intention. In fact, aside from this book I am a fan of him and his works. My issue with it has developed as I have looked into the bible for support to his claims....and haven't found much. So either one of two things is happening: Bell's understanding of scripture is far beyond what I can comprehend and interpret.....Or it has swayed from what truly is written in black and white [and red] due to a longing for a God that operates under our own desires.
I came across this video that sums up my thoughts better than I can, and then I'm not spending any more time on debating this particular issue. Let's turn the focus from the line of salvation and keep the focus on the actual Word. And most importantly--love.